Children.....and the things they say.

My children are brats. I love them dearly, but here are some things that just make me laugh so incredibly hard.

Scene 1: Logan and Kylee are playing with Kylee's doll house, and Kylee, being the boss that she is, is telling Logan exactly how/what/when things will happen. Apparently Logan disagrees and carries on his merry way. With that being said, I hear....

Kylee-"Wogan, stop!"
Logan-"la la la"
Kylee-"Wogan, I said STOP! Do it THIS way. WOGAN!!!!" (I'm picturing 3 year old curses right about now.)
Logan-"Kylee...I can do it this way if I wanna."
Kylee-"Wogan! I'm gonna hit you!"
Logan-"No you're not. I'll tell mommy."
Kylee-"WOGAN! I'm gonna hit you!" SMACK
Logan-(SCREAM)"MOMMY!"


Scene 2: Logan and Kylee are now playing on the doll house with Logan's cars and trucks. They have decided that the front frame of the house makes a really stellar race track

Logan-"Kylee, we have to make the cars go this way, around the track, okay?"
Kylee-"Okay."
Logan-"Kylee, I said this way." (Apparently Kylee still isn't cooperating.) "KYLEE! I said this way...no....NO!...NOT THAT WAY!!!!! MOMMY!!!!"
Kylee-"Wogan...you're such a baby." (I hear a BIG sigh, as she storms off into the living room.)


Scene 3: Logan has decided he's simply had enough of Kylee's crap. So, he goes into his room and closes the door. (Now, we want the kids to know we value their privacy, so they're fully entitled to go into their rooms to be alone when they like. Kylee, however, doesn't agree with our parenting)

Kylee-"Wogan! Wet me in the room!"
Logan-"No, I don't want to play with you right now."
Kylee-"Mommy! Make him wet me in!" (The tears are starting to work their way to the surface)
Logan-(cracking the door just a tad) "Kylee, I don't want to play with you right now. You made me mad. I want to be alone." (Slams door in her face. BTW...how can he SLAM a door that was only open two inches?)
Kylee-(is now sitting in front of his door, hands splayed on the white surface with monster sized tears just ROLLING down her face.) "Wogan! Pwease! I need to pway with you."
Logan-(apparently feeling a bit guilty for being ugly) "Okay, Kylee. You can come in now."
Kylee-(Showing how bratty she can be) "I don't want to pway with you now! You Butthole!" (Yes, she really called him a butt hole. I bit my tongue trying not to laugh...)