Children.....and the things they say.

My children are brats. I love them dearly, but here are some things that just make me laugh so incredibly hard.

Scene 1: Logan and Kylee are playing with Kylee's doll house, and Kylee, being the boss that she is, is telling Logan exactly how/what/when things will happen. Apparently Logan disagrees and carries on his merry way. With that being said, I hear....

Kylee-"Wogan, stop!"
Logan-"la la la"
Kylee-"Wogan, I said STOP! Do it THIS way. WOGAN!!!!" (I'm picturing 3 year old curses right about now.)
Logan-"Kylee...I can do it this way if I wanna."
Kylee-"Wogan! I'm gonna hit you!"
Logan-"No you're not. I'll tell mommy."
Kylee-"WOGAN! I'm gonna hit you!" SMACK
Logan-(SCREAM)"MOMMY!"


Scene 2: Logan and Kylee are now playing on the doll house with Logan's cars and trucks. They have decided that the front frame of the house makes a really stellar race track

Logan-"Kylee, we have to make the cars go this way, around the track, okay?"
Kylee-"Okay."
Logan-"Kylee, I said this way." (Apparently Kylee still isn't cooperating.) "KYLEE! I said this way...no....NO!...NOT THAT WAY!!!!! MOMMY!!!!"
Kylee-"Wogan...you're such a baby." (I hear a BIG sigh, as she storms off into the living room.)


Scene 3: Logan has decided he's simply had enough of Kylee's crap. So, he goes into his room and closes the door. (Now, we want the kids to know we value their privacy, so they're fully entitled to go into their rooms to be alone when they like. Kylee, however, doesn't agree with our parenting)

Kylee-"Wogan! Wet me in the room!"
Logan-"No, I don't want to play with you right now."
Kylee-"Mommy! Make him wet me in!" (The tears are starting to work their way to the surface)
Logan-(cracking the door just a tad) "Kylee, I don't want to play with you right now. You made me mad. I want to be alone." (Slams door in her face. BTW...how can he SLAM a door that was only open two inches?)
Kylee-(is now sitting in front of his door, hands splayed on the white surface with monster sized tears just ROLLING down her face.) "Wogan! Pwease! I need to pway with you."
Logan-(apparently feeling a bit guilty for being ugly) "Okay, Kylee. You can come in now."
Kylee-(Showing how bratty she can be) "I don't want to pway with you now! You Butthole!" (Yes, she really called him a butt hole. I bit my tongue trying not to laugh...)

Pregnancy avoidance....is this really worth it?

Dude...what is UP with my hormones? This is a tad personal, just FYI. So, in July I had an IUD put in because Brian and I can't seem to agree if we want more kids or not. So, I had this device inserted into my nether regions to buy us some time before anything permanent happens. Everyone I know with one, has NO problems. So, why do I have to have all of the problems? Firstly...I suffer from migraines...and one of the side effects is migraines. So, I've had a magraine a day since July, and ran out of my migraine meds. I call in my prescription....and guess what. They don't make it anymore. SO, now I'm waiting to see if my doc will send them a new one...or if I have to go see him.

Secondly...I'm on a constant roller coaster of emotions. I'm not sure if I'm happy, sad, mad, etc. One minute I'm breezing by, the next I'm madder than hell. Lovely.

Lastly....my body obviously doesn't want the thing in there b/c I'm cramping all the damn time, and gross things are happening down there. I'm half tempted to just get the sucker removed and take my chances. Then again....no I'm not. I love my kids, but one more of them and I may run off to a place unknown. (If I name the place here, and I run off, they'll find me...get it?)

Oh well....I'll see how I feel in 4 months...that is when all these side effects are supposed to subside afterall.

Night out with the 'rents.

I've been very stressed lately about finances. So, we'll be honest...who hasn't, right? So, today, feeling a tad more melencholy than usual, I decide to meet the parents at BINGO. Yeah...old people stuff...but what better way to sit and not do anything yet still be occupied?

Anyway, my mom is on some really wicked drugs for her neuropathy, and they tend to make her a bit spacey. So I'm sitting beside her, and out of the corner of my eye I see her staring at her arms as though they were foreign objects.

"Mom....yes, they're arms...you have two of them" I say cheesily at her. She then looks at me with the most classic "What the hell" expression on her face....and I say,

"Mom, you look like you just discovered you had arms." She starts laughing and nearly falls out of her chair and says, "I was looking at the scars on my arms you turd." Ahhh, parents.

I'm cursed....

A few years ago, I had it in my head that Brian and I should have a romantic weekend, just the two of us, in New Orleans. Oh, I had it planned down to the last minute. A wonderful two night stay in a fancy Bed & Breakfast, cozy romantic dinner, Beignets, coffee, touring the museums and cemeteries. It was a great too do in my book. Alas, financial issues kept us home rather than touring the exotic city. Then....Katrina happened. I was/am so sad. I love New Orleans! I really truly do, and I fully plan on going back.

THEN...we get engaged. We began planning our wedding, which only ended up with me in tears and stressed out about food, dresses and who is going to be my bride's maid. *sigh* So, in the midst of our wedding planning, we decided to elope in Hawaii instead. So, we booked our trip a full 9 months in advance. We were going to stay in a posh beach front hotel with a beach view lanai. We were going to enjoy cultural festivities such as Luaus, snorkeling, and polynesian shows. It was to be a grand time indeed. We enter the plane, and fly for nearly 8 hours when the pilot comes online to inform us that Hawaii was hit by a major earth quake. The first earthquake to hit the islands since 1981, I might add. We were the only plane that was allowed to land and take off that day. Well, for 3 days to be exact. Our first day in Hawaii had no electricity, no food, and it rained. Don't be sad, it was a wonderful time no matter what!

So, Then, Brian and I started planning a family trip to Belize. Yes, we like to travel to places where there are wonderful beaches. Not to mention that Belize itself is a stunning country that happens to border Guatemala. We figured this could be an advantageous trip with the beaches for fun, jungles and a quick trip over the border to see the Mayan Ruins. Educational and fun all in one shot! I was extremely excited to find that we could rent a cabin on the beach for 7 days for near nothing. I was also pleased to see that there was so much to do there in that small British country in the Carribbean. Alas, yet another crises has hit. A few weeks ago, a Category 4 hurricane plowed straight through Belize, and this week a Category 5 is heading straight there. What have I done to Mother Nature to have her this angry with me?

So, now I'm planning a trip with one of my best friends to visit another best friend in Michigan. I'm almost too terrified to go. I mean...what possibly horrendous thing could happen next? I think I shall simply remain home with my proverbial head buried in the sand. Oh, I hope she knows what she's getting into with having me come visit her.

As you can see...this is why I feel I'm cursed. If you see my name on your list to come stay at your hotel in your country....please don't poisen my food. I really can't possibly imagine why this is happening. Besides...if I could sway some higher power...couldn't I sway the Gods to be thinner instead?

ta-da!

I shall not be defeated by a few measely trojans. For some reason....I got on my computer today, and this loaded right up. For the first time since like....I don't know....May? So, I'm back...for now at least.

Things have been crazy hectic. We're thinking of selling our house. I don't know for sure yet, just thinking. We are looking in a neighborhood where my best friend lives. (Two plusses already) We'll see. Other than that, just daily work, kids, baths, dinner, house cleaning, etc. I've been involved in reading a lot lately. Probably because for the longest time I didn't have a computer and nothing else to do. Of course, I don't know how long I'll have my computer this time either, so I may as well jot it all down in one fell swoop.

I've been dreaming of writing again. Even though I lack the talent and follow through of a good friend of mine, I've still been thinking about it. One day I'll get it all down on paper.

Logan will be 5 this year. Yes, 5. *sigh* He'll be starting school next year, and I don't think he'll be ready. He's such a turd at times. I know that's normal, but I just don't know how he'll handle school. He's never been to "school" or any type of school setting. *sigh* Mommy worries. I hate them.

Kylee will be 4 this year, and I swear she's going on 16. Was I like her when I was younger? She's so prissy...yet at the same time if I could keep her in clothes.....wait..my mom couldn't keep me in clothes either. Great. A little me. *yay*

Anyway...I best log out before my computer crashes! Hi Rene, Leiann! Love you.