Love...Life.....

My wonderful husband...

Came home and cooked me dinner last night. He then informs me that I get a "prize" tomorrow, and that next weekend we're doing the Build-a-bear, Cheesecake Factory outing for my birthday. So...my question is this...what is he UP to???? My next question is.....WHAT IS MY PRIZE!!!! (Prize=surprise but my kids call it prizes)

Make up?

I have heard SO many people talk about Bare Essentuals make up. I must admit, I'd previously seen people wear it, and wasn't impressed. However, I can tell a total difference in their skin quality, and I have heard that it's very good for your skin, and it lasts forever. So, I figured I may as well try it. So, today I finally ordered the starter kit, and it should arrive sometime in the next week. I feel kind of guilty for betraying my trusty Almay make up, but if I can wear something lighter, and with better coverage, I'm all for it.

Heat in Houston

I live in Houston, Texas, therefore it begins to warm right about now. We've been enjoying the 70's lately, but that will quickly turn into 90's before I know it. I've been confronted with my youth lately, with the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. I'm not overly fond of facing my age, and although the physical years don't bother me, the looking the part scares me to death. I enjoy hearing people say how young I look. I'd like to keep it that way. So, for the first time in my life I'm forgoing tanning this year. I'm freckly, and I tan well, but I don't want the skin damage that goes along with it. I realize I may tan naturally even with a gallon of sun block, but I want to prevent sunburns and irreversible skin damage. I'm turning a new leaf to take better care of my skin, appearance, and body. I've taken the effort to begin losing weight and eating healthier, and that takes care of the inside, so now I must take better care of the outside. Wish me luck...I'm a former sun worshipper.

My son....

I love him more than words can even say...but let me just say he can SURELY push some serious buttons! Here lately he's been fighting more and more for independence, and in a lot of ways he reminds me of myself. He's stubborn, hell bent and determined to do things HIS way, and all in all a real pain in the butt. I get so frustrated with him, and at the same time I'm given a dose of my own medicine for all of the things I've put my parents through. I also have a different kind of love for my son. It's hard to explain it to anyone who doesn't quite understand the different types of love a person can have for their child. I love both of my children beyond words, but Logan was my little man through a very tough time in our lives. He was the single most important thing in my life when all else seemed to fall apart around me. He was my constant love, someone I could hold and care for and he needed me. Everything about what I just said sends alarm bells to psychiatrists, I'm sure, but in a time in my life when my world came crashing down around me, Logan was the small little Angel who brought me out fighting for him and a better life for me. I guess he's my saviour, and to me, he was the biggest gift from God during a painful, lonely time in my life.

My Daughter....

Kylee is the ray of sunshine in my life. When I first found out I was pregnant with her, I didn't want her. I know how that makes me sound, but I'd just had a baby, and was terrified of another baby at the same time. I was alone, in the middle of a big depression, and still trying to get the ground under my feet. I wasn't happy to hear the news of a new baby coming so soon, and I wasn't ready for it either. I learned a lot during my pregnancy, and the day she was born I felt immense love, and immense guilt for the feelings I had during my pregnancy. I guess maybe she knew it too because for the first 8 months of her life she didn't want me to hold her unless it was time to eat. It was so hard for me to be so in love with her, and so afraid of her at the same time. I wasn't afraid of Logan, so I couldn't figure out why I was afraid of her. Everyday of her life, she's brought me such joy. Her smiles are the most beautiful smiles I have ever seen, and she's such a happy child. When she was 8 months old, I was holding her on the couch, and for the very first time she fell asleep on me. I enjoyed that moment and didn't want to put her down, and so we napped right there on that couch. It was like that day was a sort of forgiving day, she forgave me for my ways of thinking, and she let me love her 100%. Ever since, we snuggle on the weekends and nap together on our couch, and just holding her brings me so much joy! The sweetest words ever are when she whispers to me that she loves me. I still feel the twinges of guilt, and maybe I tend to spoil her a bit, but my life wouldn't have been complete without her in it. I'm thankful to God for giving me a second gift in my daughter, and I know He knows what He's doing, even if we're questionable.